The Greatest Generation - The Greatest Pop

My wonderful grandfather passed away last week. He was a wonderful man and we will miss him dearly.

I had wanted to say a few words about him during his wake - but ended up delivering the Eulogy at his funeral service.

As I look over the words, I am still flooded with even more memories that I wished I had shared, but didn't......he knows how much we loved him....so I share with you those same words - my final tribute to Pop.


My Pop was a proud member of the Greatest Generation. He epitomized the age.
He was born in 1922, he grew up during the Great Depression. He served his country in WW2 - a proud 4.2 mortar man in the Pacific.
Although he was wounded in Okinawa, he never bragged about his service....he humbly returned home, married his sweetheart and lived the American Dream.

Pop was the proudest American I ever met.
His favorite song was God Bless America.

He was also the proudest Irishman I ever met - he kissed the Blarney Stone and never neglected in sending me a card every St. Patrick's Day......usually with a $10 bill inside cleverly folded to look like a $100 bill!

Pop loved his church, his family, and took pride in the work he did with his hands. Building landmarks or even in building and improving the home he loved and lived in for over 62 years.

And we can't forget his love of the golf course...happiness is, Pop on the greens!

In all honesty, Pop was a quiet man. He had a strong work ethic, strong values and principles and was a man of few words - but when he did speak - I always listened with rapt attention.

I used to always say, "My Pop is truly the NICEST man you will ever meet"

Always a smile on his face and I can't recall ever seeing him in a bad mood. EVER.

My memories of him are snippets of sights and sounds that will stay with me forever.

Pop coming home from work - slipping off his work shoes and into his trusty slippers.
Into the kitchen he would come - crisp white t-shirt, his St. Christopher medal around his neck, his well worn, soft beige work pants....smelling of sawdust, he would pour himself a big glass full of orange juice.
EXTRA PULP was Pop's favorite. I found this to be absolutely disgusting - but he loved it!

Pop had the bluest eyes - which I think shone even brighter with his smile!

And what a sly sense of humor - always the guy in the room with the perfect comeback at the perfect moment.

Scorching Hot Liquids!!!! Pop was superhuman in the consumption of soups and hot coffee or tea. If it wasn't scalding hot - it wasn't hot enough. He may have been the nicest guy - but he never hesitated in sending soup back to the kitchen that wasn't hot enough!

The man always had a tan - hair sticking straight up - and a smile on his face......

On birthdays - you could expect a call that involved picking up the phone and hearing the most beautiful rendition of Happy Birthday ever sung to you - for any encore performance of his singing talents - all you had to do was go to church....Pop sang every hymn with gusto!

In times of celebration or relaxation - the perfect Manhatten was Pop's signature drink. I credit him for teaching me the joy of the perfect cocktail. And if you have not tried a Manhattan - I highly recommend you do so at your earliest convenience.

Parties with Pop and Nan - If I am a foodie now, it is because of Pop and Nan - their legacy of dining out, dressing up or dining in and dressing down - good food and drink defined our times together.

He loved lasagna, he hated chicken.

My Pop lived a humble and meaningful life....full of the quirks and tidbits that bring individuality to all of us and our family experience.

He influenced me with his constant love and happiness. For a man of few words, you never doubted where you stood....every single time, every single visit, every single phone call would end with Pop saying the best thing....."Love You!"

And Pop......."I Love You."

Canada = USA lite....The Same But Different

A few months ago I visited Montreal and Ottawa.
It was a bit rough on me - I felt a bit out of sorts - which surprised me - because I assumed always that Canada was USA lite. It may have been the French speaking that threw my equilibrium off - I'm still not sure.

This week I am in Toronto - it turns out that Toronto is USA lite.
I like it here.
And yet, at the same time, you know you are someplace different.

In the US - we love to use our credit cards and debit cards, we never have cash.
Canadians only like to use cash and debit cards - but you better have a debit MasterCard - because they don't take Visa.
It turns out that Visa is not "everywhere you want to be"

In the US - we pride ourselves on pretending to be green and concerned about the environment.
Canadians don't pretend to be green, they really are. Even the hotel rooms have recycle bins!

In the US - you don't find WalMart's at the mall.
Canadians love when a WalMart is the anchor store. And they pile those deals high! If you want to buy hockey paraphernalia - WalMart is the place to be.

In the US - if you want to buy bulk food - you go to that aisle in the grocery store.
Canadians have a place called Bulk Barn. A whole store of bulk bins! Seriously - this place is off the hook!

In the US - Sears is a place where you buy lawnmowers and car batteries.
Canadians go there and the store is full of 70" flat screen TV's with Paris runway shows and designer duds to buy!

In the US - we love Starbucks.
Canadians love Tim Horton's, Timothy's and Second Cup - Starbucks....not so much. Don't get me wrong - Starbucks are still here - but the Tim Horton's appears to have the same appeal here that Dunkin Donuts does in New England - frenzied caffeine fiends!

In the US - when you order iced tea it is typically not sweet - unless you are in the South.
Canadians put a ton of sugar in their tea and only 2 ice cubes.

In the US - you avoid making eye contact and small talk with strangers.
Canadians talk to you all the time - and make eye contact - and are really nice! Even in elevators!

Oh, my aching back...

I go hot and cold on the blogging.

But this last cold spell has really been because I have been plagued with a terrible back problem.

It has really been a game changer for me.

Back in the early spring - I was experiencing twinges of pains here and there in my left hip - but they came quickly and soon went away..

Sadly - they started to come more often and really be a problem.

As I entered May - the pain was now constant and shooting down my leg.

I knew the pain was bad and I had a serious problem the moment I knew I needed a doctor.

I hate doctors. I hate needles. I hate, hate, hate.

First, I self diagnosed myself with sciatica. I'm a huge fan of self diagnosis and hypochondria

Second, I went to see a chiropractor - huge mistake - this actually deserves a post on it's own.

Third, when the pain was so bad I couldn't see straight, was dizzy and about to pass out - I went to the ER. they took a bizarro xray of my pelvis twice and gave me a shot in the ass....clearly not taking interest in my sciatica diagnosis - the crackpot doc on duty thought I must have fused pelvic joints?! wtf?!

The ER ended up referring me to an orthopedic doctor - who ultimately sent me for an MRI and then to a physical therapist and a pain management doctor.

It turns out - I have a herniation of the disk in the L4 L5 - apparently its not bulging too much and it is not all the way out or burst - that is supposedly good news.

The bad news is - days away from October - I am still fairly miserable.

Physical therapy is and was great - I do my exercises diligently and it gives me relief. Apparently I am also strenghtening my core so that when my disk decides to slip back into place - I won't have future problems.

The pain management doctors gave me 3 epidural steroid injections. I had to be knocked out for these. I didn't like them. I wanted a miracle and they did not provide it.

The pain doctor wants me to get another one - but I am convinced the steroids made me feel weird, and I didn't get total relief - so why should I let you bill my insurance company another $8000 for another shot?

Just give me pills.

But, I kind of hate popping pills too. I don't think they really work - and the ones that do, make me pass out so if the pain is gone, I don't even get to enjoy being pain free and awake.

I am passed out and drooling.

Not attractive.

I now have deep sympathy and empathy for those that suffer chronic pain. I don't know how much longer I can take this. I don't remember my back and leg feeling good anymore. I just feel pain, aches and tingles all the time. I can't sit for more than 30 minutes. I can't do the things I used to do. It sucks.

I have been told over and over that the healing process is long and bumpy - but somehow it doesn't make it any better.

But I will soldier on - one small pitiful shuffle at a time.

I love you Mom!

I give full credit to my parents for making me who I am.
They are awesome people.

But as this is Mother's Day - I have to give special props to Mom on her special weekend. Last year was the first time I paid tribute to Mom - but really, how can you stop at just one?

My Mom knows how much I love her. I think she would even tell you - she never has to worry that we don't have a great, loving relationship.

We are very demonstrative of our love for each other and always mangage to laugh and have tons of fun together.

I certainly consider her to be one of my favorite people, even though we couldn't be more different.

I am a fan of sunblock. As I am pale and pasty - (a complexion I get from my Mother!!!) I like to protect my skin. Mom however, likes to douse herself in Baby Oil or some toxic tanning solution called Maui Gold. You can see from the photo - the woman didn't even put a hat on her infant child at the beach! I'm squinting and looking like a special needs child. Mom - what kind of skin damage happened to me that day?

I don't think we ever mutually agree on what looks or is good. Be it clothing choices, hairstyles, music, movies or decorating choices. When I think something is fabulous - My Mom says, "oh, that's different" (key phrase for I hate everything about it)

I pretty much made fun of every outfit Mom put me in as a child. She did terrible things to my hair in the 70's. Bad perms, terrible barrette placement and she used to hit me on the head with the brush.

Even though I say we have different taste in music, she is the reason I love bad music. All I have to do is hear a few bars of Burt Bacharach or the 5th Dimension and I am singing along and thinking of my Mom.

Mom hates Edward. She doesn't get Twilight. When I determined that all mature women were on Team Edward, and all teenage girls were on Team Jacob - she bucked the system and went for Team Jacob. She doesn't even know Edward is a vampire.... she thinks it's a book about witches. She doesn't always pay attention to the details....but that's ok, I still love her.

Each time I come home, I inevitably have to make some sort of change to the house. Mom loves to inject tacky occasionally - If I had any sense of style as a young child - this furniture would not have lasted long.

And despite all of our differences - Mom is still my best friend.

Mom is always tolerant of me. Even though I give her a terrible time and make fun of her. She has always been right by my side and the best support. As mothers should, she loves me no matter what and let's me be me. We share as much now as we did when it was just the two of us - with Dad far away at sea.

As an adult now, I can't tell you how much I appreciate having a Mom that still remains proud of me and gives the best advice and support.

Mom continues to remind me all the time how important it is to love deeply and laugh often.

Thanks for teaching me how to be joyful, have fun and reminding me to laugh at myself.

Basta....no pasta!

Let's take a moment to count down the moments until the Lenten fast of no pasta is over. Easter is April 24th. Today is April 10th. Technically speaking we have 14 more days of no pasta. This has not been easy. But it was stop swearing, or stop eating pasta for lent. And there is no way I could ever stop swearing. (I swear out loud, I swear in my head - so really there is no way to control thoughts - which would not have made it a very valid effort) I gave up pasta once for lent - that was 5 years ago - the only reason I did it then was because I was arriving in Italy on Easter Sunday - I was able to break the fast with loads of pasta. It was like a reward. I'm not going to be in Italy. So it's kind of an anti-climatic end to the fast. Poo. I don't think this fast will be habit changing either. The year I gave up Starbucks for Lent - I was seriously dropping way too much cash on lattes and mochas. And even though I woke at sunrise that Easter and was the first person in line at Starbucks that Sunday - I actually noticed I stopped going as much after the fact. But let's be real - I don't see myself cutting back on my pasta. I also convinced myself that not eating pasta would help reduce the size of my ass - which it has. The pomegranate seed dress that I bought with the intent of wearing to the February wedding brunch - will now at least fit for the April wedding shower. (you can't really see it good - but the little red dots look like pomegranate seeds to me - the dress is really cute on - the hanger appeal is not so much. Trust me, super cute and very spring appropriate. I would like to thank those of you that ate pasta in front of me. Each of you savored every morsel - and I think all but one of you actually felt kind of bad and guilty for eating it in front of me. How cool that my Lenten fast would not only make me look better - but result in residual Catholic guilt for Catholics and Non-Catholics alike. But let's stop the madness already. Let's be able to partake in pasta together, with no guilt. Let's order plates and plates of papparadelle and say to hell with pomegranate seed dresses. (ok, not really - let's still order plates and plates of pasta - I will just keep moving on PAR and than I can eat the plates of pasta and still look good in pomegranate seed dresses)

I'm a fragrance whore....

I literally can't get enough of fragrance lately. Just a few short weeks ago I was all over Jo Malone and then Flowerbomb.

Now its Miss Dior Cherie.

Miss Dior Cherie makes me want to hug myself.

It has notes of green tangerine, violette, pink jasmine, patchouli, musk, sweet strawberry leaves, caramel popcorn and stawberry sorbet.

I smell delightful and am full of happiness.

I also can't believe how much money I am dropping on fragrance now. But, I am keenly aware that all sophisticated women need a fragrance wardrobe.

My closet is expanding to accomodate.

Love Love Love Love Love Love......

Love is in the air folks.
And in honor of the week, I am going to spread the love.
And really, having the love glow about you makes you look better....so let's go with it.

We have a big wedding this week! eeeee! I am jumping with excitement for the love birds!

It's Valentine's Day tomorrow - which guarantees me a bouquet of my favorite flowers - tulips!

I am surrounded by love really. I need to be thankful for that.
My family and friends, even Tony and Bebe smother me in it. For that I am grateful. I hope I smother you each of you back.

Let's take a bit of time to spread some love and be glad it's in our lives everyday in whatever form available.

music, poems, art, books, movies, Mr. Darcy, Edward, Mike Green, red wine, snuggling under a blanket, laughter with friends, fabulous food that makes your toes curl, a great hug, an even more fantastic kiss, a shared private joke, best girl friends, best boy friends, best moms and dads, memories of past loves, mojitos with strangers, secrets with sisters, getting tucked into bed.

You all know who you are - thank you for the love you give me and the love you let me give you.
xo